While listening to material from this apostolate (Apostolate of Jesus Christ the Returning King), I heard that Jesus loved me. This is what drew me in to this apostolate. This absolutely astounded me. Jesus had my attention and now I thirsted to try to find out why He loved me and how I could return this love. This brought me to know I needed to change.
My involvement in this apostolate has changed my life profoundly. It has changed how I face disappointments and struggles, my prayer life, my relationships with my family and friends. It has helped me in times of crisis, and in how I see things. It has changed me into a person that desires to live a life in beatitude.
I took an inventory of my life and found so many areas of it lacking. Armed with the guidelines for lay apostles, I began to pray daily the Allegiance prayer to Our Father and the morning offering to Jesus. I tried to attend weekly adoration, went to monthly confession, and began examining my relationships with my family and friends.
As I progressed into the apostolate I was inspired by the messages of Jesus and the writings by Anne to change the way I faced my struggles. Previously, I would get very discouraged at my failings; but through study and prayer I began to see my struggles as opportunities to learn about love. The struggles are still hard but now when I am tempted to think they are too hard, I remember that Jesus is with me and with His grace we can get through it. Another consoling thought I’ve learned is that Jesus doesn’t need me to be perfect in order to serve Him. He just needs me to show up.
My prayer life has changed. I now desire to live out my allegiance to Our Father and my consecration to Jesus and Mary. Contemplating what it means to live a Eucharistic life, of knowing that Jesus is with me, is a joyful journey and one I’m sure will take me into eternity. I am now thankful for the grace of being called into prayer and it is a grace I desire to nurture.
In regard to my relationships, change was needed. I’ve had to look at each relationship and examine it. I asked my husband if my involvement in this apostolate has had any effect on him. His reply was, “It has had a big effect on us; a positive but profound impact. It has changed everything to a subtle degree.” He explained that, “This apostolate has given you a structure on which to build; and has led to your rapid spiritual growth. This is reflected in everything. It has changed our ‘dates,’ your dress, our conversations. It permeates your whole being.”
Some of the comments from my children about the effect of the apostolate are:
“You radiate an inner calm.”
“Driven.”
“You talk cheerfully about death.”
“You are in the merchant trade,” (evangelize with DFOT materials).
“It has made dad more religious.”
“You have more friends.”
“Since the meetings take place in our home, I have become more exposed to the presence of God.”
“You are forced to use technology,” (because of different projects related to the apostolate).
“I am waiting for our promised family trip to Ireland!” (my husband and I made the promise after a Eucharistic Day of Renewal hosted in Ireland).
When we experience a crisis, I feel armed with spiritual weapons. I now see things differently. Even though I still struggle with feelings of fear, anxiety, or confusion, I have something to fall back on. The love of Jesus supports me. I now try to remember even though things may look overwhelming, this is a great opportunity to show my love for our Triune God and place all my trust in Him. I’ve learned there is no greater way to give Him glory. He wants our time on earth to be peaceful and educational, and with this in mind I try to move forward despite the obstacles.
And so this brings me to how I, along with a faithful band of lay apostles, try to spread the good news of this apostolate. We share with others the works in this apostolate and in some of our parishes the materials are on display. We have a lay apostle prayer group, and several study groups. But probably the most important way we spread the good news of this apostolate is by living out our faith in love, in our words and in our actions. We believe that the doors to hearts will be opened by the hands of faith.
